If we are to fully understand the workings of emotional intelligence we must first observe and study one of the fundamental theorist of last century known as Abraham Maslow. Maslow was probably best known for his hierarchy of needs which described the flow of emotional growth In a person and also explained how and why a person may not move on in life if they are experiencing a certain situation or why they may move forward for seemingly no reason.

Below is his creation known as the Hierarchy of needs, and the theory behind this is that each level cannot be fully connected to unless the lower level has been emotionally fulfilled, for example if a person would like a beautiful relationship (level 3) but is about to lose their home (level 1) their mind will now be physical, mentally or emotionally able to focus on anything other than sorting out the home (survival)

Level one – Basic needs

This is the level that requires food, water and shelter. Without food and water all life would be severely at risk, with the possibility of death. This then is more important to life than any other area.

Level two – Security needs

Once a person has the ability to eat and stay alive, the next fundamental need is that of security. This security covers emotional, (will I be rejected?), physical (will I be attacked?) and mental (will I be harassed?). If a person does not feel secure, this can lead to a feeling of wanting to avoid life and stay in the comfort zone.

Level three – Relationship needs

If the basic and security needs are fulfilled, a person may feel secure enough to connect with other people and to form effective relationships with those people like and different from him or herself. The degree of satisfaction derived from this area can be directly related to how secure a person feels in their life.

Level four – Self-esteem needs

When a person feels comfortable in connecting with other people and can form effective relationships (people skills), the person can then progress to self esteem, which states that the person is then seen as worthy to others and to him or herself, or that the person knows he or she is valuable to others and can therefore do their own thing without looking for approval, this is also known as true independence.

Level five – Self actualisation

This is the highest level and covers the needs for self-fulfilment and
self-development to find out ‘who’ they are inside. This can be a particularly daunting task to undertake if the person has not undertaken the lower levels.

If you are not where you feel you could be in life, don’t try harder to do what already does not work, but work on what is holding you back. Usually most people limiting actions come from level 2 (security need) buried deep inside. Look within and work with your mind and remember, you can’t beat nature!